Derya Coskundeniz'le about marrying and having children

This month, we have been to the warm houses of Mehmet Coşkundeniz and his wife Derya Cokundeniz. Of course, it was a conversation about the challenges and beauties of twin life, along with very good messages about love.

Interview: Müge Serçek Biroğlu
Photos: Tuna Yılmaz

How's life with children?

Contact Derya directly: It's going hard. Nothing like it used to be. While we used to get up at the time we wanted, go to bed, watch movies, read books and spend time in our social life, now everything is adjusted according to children's sleep hours and feeding patterns. In a sense, we are restricted.

Mehmet Coşkundeniz: Their mother is more interested because I'm at work for most of the day. Our biggest problem is sleep. They wake up every morning at 8:00. For example, I came home about two and a half last night. I was in the paper until then. However, I woke up at eight o'clock again with the girls. New Year's Eve

We went out in the evening, but returned to our house before entering the new year, children enter the new year in front of television. But all this is a matter of choice, we are the ones who prefer life with children.

How did you know you were pregnant?

Derya C .: When Mehmet was flirting, he would say, "I wish we had twins!" I would be angry at him for knowing that it was very difficult to raise twins. When we went to the doctor and he told us that we would have twins, I thought for a moment that Mehmet and the doctor were cooperating. This couldn't have been a coincidence.

Are there twins in the family?

Derya C .: Yes, Mehmet's aunts are identical twins. Still, I never thought we'd have twins.

What happened next?

Derya C .: Then we started thinking about everything in pairs. My biggest fear was that when I had twins, I could love one more than the other. But when I saw them both at birth, this question mark went off spontaneously. The love of twins is a very different love, both of which are precious, they cannot be separated.

Aren't you afraid to look at both at the same time?

Derya C.: People around me said it would be difficult. My attitude was, “Oh, what will happen, both grow up! Ama, but I saw that it wasn't. (Smiling.)

Mehmet C .: I wanted to have twins and girls. We decided together when we had children, so it was planned. Therefore, after having children, we did not have any doubts as to whether we acted early. It was a big surprise that they were twins.

How was your pregnancy?

Derya C .: I had a good pregnancy, but I couldn't stand because I was alive. Thirty-first week, I was hospitalized at the risk of preterm labor. I was in labor, I had pains, but I was wondering if I still had pains because I couldn't breathe. I stayed in the hospital for a week. They were patient until thirty-seventh week. When I entered the last month, I realized that it was really difficult. Until then, I wandered constantly, dusting, doing my house. The thing that pushed me the most in recent months was shortness of breath. I wanted to ride the oxygen cylinder.

Did you ever get over it?

Derya C .: I can't say I'm too cranky. I'd go over red mullet and paint.

Mehmet C .: As an Izmirite, it is very normal for him to crush these two.

How much weight did you gain during this period?

Derya C.: I gained 12 pounds.

Both twin pregnancy and twelve pounds? It's a miraculous thing…

Derya C .: My doctor said the same thing. But I was a very healthy pregnant woman, but I never had to worry about losing weight. When I found out that I was pregnant, I thought I'd eat a lot and I'd gain 30 kilos, but I guess it's a little genetic too, because my mother didn't gain a lot of weight in her pregnancy either.

Have you been to childbirth preparation courses?

Derya C .: No, we didn't have that time. But Mehmet and I used to do online research every night. In what week of pregnancy I would learn about that week. In case of any adverse situation, we constantly read and researched what we should do, to know what was right and what was wrong.

Did you do sports?

Derya C .: Yeah, I swam plenty and I walked. I applied the program specially prepared by my sports teacher. I can say I'm pregnant.

So, how did you feed during this period?

Derya C .: Since I'm from Izmir, I'm not much carnivore, and I usually cook with olive oil. So I continued my pregnancy in the same way, I did not apply anything very separate. I didn't drink cola and coffee, I didn't eat raw meat and mussels.

How was the birth?

Derya C .: I went to play good bye, but something went wrong in the epidural caesarean section. The arteries and veins that feed the babies were closed spontaneously after the placenta came out, but my veins were not closed and I turned the operating room into a blood pool. Thanks to my two surgeons.

Mr. Mehmet, have you been born?

Mehmet C .: No, I didn't. Good thing I didn't, I couldn't stand it. Normally, the mother should also leave the maternity ward twenty minutes after the baby leaves. When Derya didn't come out even after an hour and a half, I realized something was wrong. Then everything went fine, even Derya was quite jolly after leaving.

How did the first forty days go, did you have a hard time with two babies?

Derya C .: The first forty days we both didn't sleep. The adventure we had in the first three months was exhausting us. Every night I took one of the babies and gave it to Mehmet to breastfeed him. This time I was taking the other baby and breastfeeding. We forgot what sleep was.

You're one of the lucky mothers who got help from his wife during this period.

Derya C .: Yes, I am really lucky in this sense.
Mehmet C .: Although Derya has twin babies, she put her system in good shape. I think motherhood is an instinct that occurs in every woman after birth. Obviously I, Derya's mother, and her friends did not predict that Derya would be such a good mother. After birth it changed very well. He had an unconcerned attitude before. In fact, this attitude is also good for the place, it keeps you young. However, after becoming a mother, Derya established her own order very well.

How long did you breastfeed?

Derya C .: I was able to breastfeed for five months. It was very difficult because they were twins, I was breastfeeding them at the same time. I didn't count the amount of liquid I consumed so I could have milk again for the next two hours of breastfeeding. I also drank milk teas, bulgur rice, I ate şöbiyet. I did everything I was told to have milk. After five months they stopped sucking spontaneously.

How are they?

Derya C .: Thank goodness. I've never experienced anything I've ever heard from twin mothers. I've heard that twins from other mothers constantly fight and even bite each other. Ours never happened. The push is a little bit inlaid, but not enough to harm each other. Because we're twins, we don't dress the same thing. Because they're both different individuals.

Did Daddy change you?

Mehmet C .: It changed the way I look at the world. I used to be a much more aggressive and black-eye person, not anymore. Because I'm so afraid I'm going to be separated from my kids. My children became my hobby. I'm very happy to take care of them.
How did you decide their names?

Mehmet C .: Deep chose Derya, and I named it Blue. I often use Mavi in ​​my writings, especially when telling love.
I was wondering, why is the name of the blue-eyed one deep, while the name of the brown-eyed one is Blue?

Mehmet C .: When we were in the womb, we set the name of the one standing deep, Deep, and the one ahead of us was Blue. After birth, Blue's eyes were also blue, as the eye colors of newborn babies are not clear, we put the names as specified. After two or three months, Derin's eyes remained blue, and Blue's eyes turned brown.

Did your marriage change after the child?

Mehmet C .: The time we devoted to each other began to diminish, so we know the value of that time better and try to make the best use of it.

How did you decide to get married? You convinced Mrs. Derya to get married, right?

Mehmet C.: Derya was not a very marriage aficionado. I wasn't either. We were very happy when we were flirting and having fun together. There is a classic distinction: kadın The woman to be married or the woman to be entertained? ”. I say, marry the woman to be entertained… This applies to both men and women; Marry someone who makes you happy and entertain. Labels, money or something. What matters is the quality time you spend with the person you love. Even though we have been married for four years now, we say to each other almost every evening, “Good thing I am married to you”. Because we're two lovers rather than husband and wife. We'il still go out to the bar, pick up each other at the bar.