Baby Development

Is Discipline Really Necessary?

Is Discipline Really Necessary?


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Ceyda, 40 months old, is having a difficult afternoon because she has just learned that her parents will be out in the evening. Although she will be staying at home with an older sister whom she knows and loves before, Ceyda has made her parents' trip a personal resentment. Instead of using his mother's advance notification as an opportunity to prepare for this separation, Ceyda takes some form of attack and tries to persuade her not to go. Orum I don't want you to go, Her she sighs every 20 minutes. While his ability to put his emotions into words has risen in an interesting way, the following sentences come out of his mouth: im I will miss you very much. ”,“ Why do you leave me? ”, Ince I will be very sad when you leave.”

Ceyda's mother is both upset about her daughter's experiences and feels guilty as a result of Ceyda's wonderful ability to express how bad she feels. Between the feelings of sadness and guilt, the mother sometimes cheerfully cheers Ceyda that she will have a good time with her sister, sometimes threatens to stop whimpering and pull herself back together so she can see her room. Ceyda's protest continues unabated. When the caretaker comes and prepares for his parents to leave, Ceyda's reactions increase. Ceyda clings to her mother and screams, ma Don't let go. Gitme In fact, Ceyda's mother inadvertently disrupted her daughter's ability to control her anxiety. The fact that the mother was patient and refrained from stopping Ceyda's whining made the child think that she had the right to express her feelings as well as the right to blackmail her mother with her feelings.
A less patient attitude would be more beneficial for Ceyda. She should have clearly told Anne Ceyda that what she was doing was unfair and that she had wasted her time together. This requires the mother to stop chatting and withdraw and set a distance so that the child can learn to control herself.

You can ask Ceyda not to feel guilty because she has behaved badly in such a situation. If so, Ceyda's ability to feel guilty shows that her emotional development is good. As children grow up, healthy children (like adults) should regret when they do something wrong. Guilt is a useful feeling if it is felt as a result of a damaging behavior. Guilt is unhealthy if the child feels this feeling predominantly in any situation (for example, he is constantly worried that he is doing something wrong and is arrested for self-expression).

The best teachers in teaching children what it is wrong to do are not parents but often peers and older siblings. If they do not think well about what the child is doing, they do not hesitate to express it and the child learns very well from this reaction that his behavior is wrong. Parents are very worried that if they object to the child or withdraw their intimacy for a while, they will create guilt or the child will feel unloved. This concern is not true, neither parent nor child believes such a thing will happen. In fact, it is most detrimental for children to pretend that the parent's well-being with the child persists in the face of objectionable behavior because it is not sincere and children understand it. Our true feelings are the most important element of helping children to see how their behavior affects other people and gain internal control.

As we have seen in the case of Ceyda, children with advanced skills can also use talking about emotions as a form of aggression. If the parent feels that the child is trying to crush him by speaking, it is necessary to stop verbal aggression in younger children, as it is necessary to stop physical aggression.

The good news is that the parent's setting clear boundaries / rules strengthens the parent-child relationship rather than damaging it. In order to establish a healthy relationship with your child, you should be aware that minor disputes or quarrels on certain issues do not harm your overall compliance with your child.



Comments:

  1. Zuluktilar

    similar is there anything?

  2. Dunos

    What is he up to?

  3. Clyftun

    Agreed, it's the funny answer

  4. Benoyce

    Do you think it doesn't matter?

  5. Maclean

    In my opinion, you admit the mistake. Write to me in PM, we will handle it.



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